Emmett Gives Jasper A Haircut
by FatalFrame203
Summary: Emmett Gives Jasper A Haircut It works as both a summery and a title. Characters may be OOC.
1. Haircut One

'You sure you want to do this, Jazz?' Emmett Cullen asked as he ran a rough hand through Jasper Hale's chin-length, wavy, honey-blonde hair. 'You know it doesn't grow back.'  
'I know, but it's time for a change,' Jasper said firmly, staring at the wall in front of him with unblinking eyes, 'Besides, Alice likes short hair. I know she does. I would've asked Rose to do it, but she'd say no. Edward and Bells are off on a hunting trip with Ness, so…I'm putting my hair in your hands Em,' Jasper said, not taking his eyes off the white, picture less wall.  
'Okay man; don't forget I've only cut hair once before so do not get all crazy on me if I mess up, got it?' Jasper nodded his head, 'Good, now stay still. I need complete and utter-silence in order to do this right,' Emmett said firmly. He picked the scissors up off the side of the bathroom sink and looked at Jasper's hair; trying to find the best place to start. Seconds, and soon minutes, started to tick by and Jasper was started to feel a bit impatient.  
'Emmett,' Jasper said, breaking the silence.  
'Shhh, shhh!' Emmett hushed him. A few more seconds ticked by. Jasper was about to say something when he was cut off by the sound of loud, heavy rock metal music. He looked over and saw that Emmett had brought in a boom box. 'Much better!' Emmett said with a smile before forcing Jasper to look straight again, 'Now, let's get to work!' Emmett said with an ear-to-ear smile. While tapping his foot and shaking his ass, Emmett lifted a good size chunk of Jasper's honey blonde hair and raised the scissors. 'Last chance Jazz to get out of it,' Emmett said before he started to bop his head to the music.  
'Just do it,' Jasper said. He closed his eyes when he heard the threaded crunch of the scissors slicing through his thick hair. Emmett causally tossed the chunk of hair onto Jasper's lap. Jasper looked down at it and let out a barely audible whimper. Jasper's eyes widened when another chunk of hair, even longer then the other, was tossed onto his lap. _Oh God…_ Jasper thought _what have I gotten myself into? _Jasper watched with uneasy eyes as the pile on his lap got bigger and bigger and bigger till it tumbled over off his lap and onto the floor. 'Emmett, don't go too short.'  
'Relax buddy,' Emmett said before tossing another good size chunk of hair onto Jasper's lap, 'You look great, no you look better then great, you look hot. Alice will go nuts,' Emmett said.  
'If you say so…' Jasper said. After awhile, Emmett lifted the hair that fell over Jasper's eyes and cut them off just near the scalp. Seeing that, Jasper began to panic. _He cut my bangs to nearly my scalp! _He screamed inside his head. Emmett cut a few stray stands of hair before putting the scissors down. Jasper was about to get up to rush to the mirror when Emmett slapped a hand down onto his shoulder and forced him back down.  
'Woah there cowboy,' Emmett said, 'We're almost done. It just needs one finishing touch,' Emmett said. He looked around the bathroom for a few minutes before finally finding what he wanted. 'Ah-ha! Alice's hair-gel. This stuff is strong enough to keep a brick-building without cement standing,' Emmett said before squeezing more then necessary into his right hand. He put the bottle down before rubbing his hands together and aggressively running them through what was left of Jasper's hair. 'Done!' Emmett said with a smile. Jasper bolted out of the chair and ran to the bathroom mirror.  
'Oh my God…' he gasped when he saw his reflection. His hair, once chin-length, was now barely an inch. The hair he had left stuck out in every direction known-to-man.  
'Well?' Emmett asked, 'Don't it look awesome?' he asked. Emmett's mouth dropped open when he saw Jasper do something no vampire do before…he cried. Warm tears slowly rolled down Jasper's cheeks, 'Woah…'  
'Honey, I'm home!' cried a cheerful voice that made Jasper freeze.  
'Alice is home…oh God I can't let her see me!' and with that, Jasper was gone. Emmett quickly cleaned up the hair clippings before walking downstairs. 'Hey Seth, I didn't know you were here,' Emmett said when he spotted Seth Clearwater sitting in the living room.  
'I got here awhile ago. Bella said to be ready to pick up Ness, she and Jacob are going out tonight,' Seth explained.  
'Oh…' Emmett said, he then turned to the little pixie standing at the door with five bags in each hand, 'Hey Alice.'  
'Hey Em,' Alice said with a pixie smile, 'I got you the cutest sweater ever!' she dropped the bags and then reached into one. She pulled out a light blue sweater with a picture of a flower on the spot his heart would be. 'When Rose sees you in this she'll die! …Well not really,' Alice said before tossing the sweater to Emmett.  
'Oh, gee, thanks…I love it…' Emmett lied, putting on a fake smile.  
'I knew you would,' Alice said, 'Where's Jazzy? I bought him a hat I think will just make him look so adorable,' she reached into one of the bags and pulled out a light pink hat. With a quick gust of wind, Jasper suddenly appeared; and with the hat on.  
'Hey babe,' Jasper said before kissing Alice on the cheek, 'Love the hat,' he said, lying.  
'…No you don't,' both Emmett and Alice said. Jasper shot a deadly glare in Emmett's direction before looking back at his pixie-wife.  
'Jasper…Jasper honey you were crying…' Alice said, noticing the tear streaks, 'But that….that doesn't happen unless…a vampire is completely and hopelessly sad…what happened?' he looked at Emmett, expecting help, but didn't receiver any. He looked back at his wife, 'Jasper, tell me,' she said a little bit more firmly. Jasper stared at her a few seconds before letting out a sigh. He pulled the hat off and Alice gasped, 'Jazz you cut your hair!'  
'You hate it don't you…?'  
'No, no! I love it, it really fits you!' Alice exclaimed, smiling.  
'Really?' Jasper asked, smiling slight. Alice nodded quickly before reaching up and touching the messy short, short spikes, 'Emmett went way shorter then I originally wanted though…'  
'Its fine, you look sexy,' Alice said before picking up the bags and hurrying upstairs with them, 'Come on Jazz!' she called. Jasper looked at Emmett before hurrying after his pixie wife. Emmett stood there by the front door, grinning. Alice actually...liked the haircut he gave Jasper? Really?  
'We're home!' cried a voice from the back of the house. The young vampire knew instantly that the voice belonged to his dear brother. 'Did we miss anything?' Edward asked from the kitchen. Emmett's smile grew larger when an idea suddenly struck him. Why stop at Jasper's hair...? He had a house full of men with hair. Hell, he had an entire town of men with hair.  
'This will be fun,' Emmett said before walking briskly to the kitchen to join his brother, sister-in-law, and niece.

(_Author's Note: Should I write a second chapter? Reviews are nice!)_


	2. Haircut Two

After Bella and Renesmee left to change out of their animal-blood drenched clothes, Emmett turned his attention to Edward; who was currently washing the mountain lion blood off his hands.  
'So what you guys do while we were gone?' Edward asked, too tired to look into Emmett's mind and find out that way. Plus, he found out long ago that it was somewhat hopeless to find something out in Emmett's head. Looking for something in Emmett's head is like looking for a needle in a hay stack. It just took to long and was too tiring.  
'Not much,' Emmett said with a shrug of his muscular shoulders. He looked over at Edward, whose back was to him. His eyes moved to the back of his head. Edward had a head of beautiful, thick bronze hair that stuck out in every direction known-to-man. It was basically the Albert Einstein hairstyle; only shorter and Edward could actually pull the look off 'Hey Ed-'  
'No,' Edward said flat-out. He had looked into Emmett's mind in time to see what he was gonna ask, 'No way in Hell, Emmett.'  
'Awe, come on Eddie! You've had that hairstyle for the last like…fifty years!' Emmett pleaded.  
'And if you hadn't touched it before, I'd still have a ponytail.'  
'That look, looked stupid on you Edward. You should be _thanking _me for getting rid of that thing!' Emmett said. Edward rolled his butterscotch colored eyes, 'Come on Ed, please?'  
'No, and that's final,' Edward said before turning and walking out of the living room. Emmett mumbled before sitting down at the kitchen table. He tapped his fingers impatiently against the wooden tabletop as he struggled to think of who to ask next. Just then, Carlisle entered the kitchen. His usually neat blonde hair was in complete disarray Emmett noticed as he watched his father walk across the kitchen and open the fridge. Bella had come up with an idea awhile back to keep the blood of animals in the fridge, so they wouldn't always have to skip town whenever hungry. Esme put candles, which were always lit, all around the kitchen to keep both the flies away and to keep Bella's human friends from gagging and puking. Carlisle grabbed a carton labeled 'Black Bear Blood' and walked over to the cabinets.  
'Been running Carlisle?' Emmett asked, watching as his father searched for a glass.  
'What? Oh, yeah…' Carlisle said before pulling a hand back and running it through his hair, somewhat flattening. 'Need to get some more hair gel,' he said before grabbing a glass.  
'Or, better yet, I could cut it for you,' Emmett suggested with a smile. Carlisle froze for a second before pouring the bear blood into the glass. He put the carton away and took a sip before answering.  
'I don't think so,' Carlisle said.  
'Awe come on please? I did Jasper's and he likes it! Why doesn't anybody else trust me?'  
'Because, we remember what you did to Ed-'  
'But that was years ago!' Emmett protested; a slight frown on his face. Carlisle looked at him for what seemed like forever before finally answering.  
'Fine, but only a little. Just enough to get it out of my eyes. Got it?' Carlisle asked.  
'Yes, promise!' Emmett said, lying through his paper-white teeth. He jumped up from his chair and dashed out of kitchen to gather what he needed. Carlisle chugged down the remains of the blood and started washing the cup. By the time he was finished, Emmett was back. Emmett pulled out one of the kitchen chairs and gestured for Carlisle to sit down.  
'Remember, not to much off. And I mean it Emmett,' Carlisle said before sitting down.  
'Yeah, yeah, yeah,' Emmett said nonchalantly before pulling a thin black comb out of the pocket of his white sweater. He ran the comb thoroughly through Carlisle's tick, slightly curly hair; pulling it back out of his face. 'Just relax,' Emmett said before pulling a pair of sharp scissors out of his other pocket. He lifted a lock of blonde hair and raised the scissors. He snipped away the a few short strands and let them fall meekly onto Carlisle's lap. Carlisle let out a relieved sigh. _Okay, now for the real fun _Emmett thought, still holding the lock of hair. He lowered the scissors down to nearly the skin and snipped it off. Emmett tossed the pale blonde hair over his shoulder and lifted after good sized lock of hair. Carlisle tapped his finger impatiently against his leg, completely oblivious to the fact that he was losing way more hair then he thought he was. The pile of hair behind Emmett grew bigger and bigger as he tossed more freshly cut locks of hair over his shoulder. After a short while, all the hair on top of Carlisle's head had been reduced down almost to the skin. The back, sides, and his bangs were left. Emmett, to be safe, combed Carlisle's bangs back before gently lifting them and cutting them to nearly the skin. He tossed the now useless bangs over his shoulder; where they slowly fell onto the pile of blonde hair, which finally tumbled over with the extra weight. As hard as it was to believe, Emmett was finding out that Carlisle had just as much hair as Jasper did; maybe even more! Only he kept it combed and gelled, unlike Jasper who let it fall around his face. Emmett then pulled a set of hair clippers out of his sweater pocket and plugged them in.  
'Emmett,' Carlisle said, oblivious to the fact that he was nearly bald on the top of his head and that there was a giant pile of hair behind him.  
'Don't worry,' Emmett said before snapping on an attachment onto the clippers, 'These are only to trim the sides. You'll have more hair on the side then on the top,' …he wasn't technically lying. Carlisle looked at him for a few moments before looking forward. Emmett got behind Carlisle and quietly snapped the attachment off. _No need for this _he thought before putting the attachment in his pocket. He turned them on and placed them gingerly on the bottom of his neck. Slowly, and cautiously, he pushed the hair clippers into the blonde, slightly curly locks. He ran them up the middle of the back of Carlisle's head, stopping when he reached the already cut hair. He repeatedly did this till he reduced all the hair on the back of his head down to nothing. He knew if he rubbed his hand against it, which he wouldn't since he knew that would get him caught, it would fell like velvet. Emmett stood by Carlisle's right side and placed the clippers under Carlisle's sideburn. Quickly, not wanting to see that the hair clippers had no attachment, Emmett ran the clippers up the side of Carlisle's head; quickly removing the sideburn. He quickly made ends-meat of the hair on the sides of Carlisle's head. When he was done, he tided the edges up. After a few minutes, he was done. 'There, you look awesome Carlisle,' Emmett said, smiling an ear-to-ear smile. Carlisle automatically reached up and ran his hand over the top of his head; expecting to feel silky locks  
'Emmett!' he yelled before standing up and facing his son. He ran his hands all over the top of his head, his eyes as wider then ever, 'What did you do!'  
'I gave you a haircut that I knew would look awesome on you,' Emmett answered, still smiling. For the first time in his vampire-life, Emmett saw anger fill his father's face. His eyes were filled with anger, his teeth were bare, and he looked like he was about to spring at him. Before he could, though, Esme entered the room. Her caramel colored hair pulled up in a loose ponytail. She was dressed in dark jeans, black high-heeled boots, and an off-the-shoulder purple t-shirt.  
'Carlisle!' Esme gasped before covering her mouth in utter shock, 'You cut you hair?'  
'No, he did,' Carlisle snarled, his glare not leaving me. Esme looked at me, shocked.  
'Emmett…not again…'  
'I think he looks awesome!' Emmett protested.  
'Thanks to you I'm gonna be practically bald for all eternity!' he snarled. Emmett's eyes widened when Carlisle's eyes quickly changed from butterscotch to black.  
'Carlisle, baby,' Esme said before hurrying over to her husband. She took his face in her delicate hands and mad him look at her, 'Honey….calm down, please,' Carlisle blinked a few times and his eyes slowly returned to butterscotch. 'You look very handsome,' she said, smiling a gentle smile. She reached up with one hand and ran it over the top of Carlisle's head. 'Really, you do,' she said.  
'Really…?' Carlisle said, the anger in his voice gone. Esme's smile grew a little bigger and suddenly, much to Emmett's surprise, Carlisle smiled a gentle smile. 'Thanks Esme…'  
'You're welcome,' she said before gently kissing Carlisle and giving him a hug. Emmett stood there silently, not sure what to do. After a minute or so, Esme pulled away. 'Come on, I need your help with something outside,' Esme said before gently taking Carlisle's hand and gently pulling him out of the kitchen. Emmett stood there for a few minutes before smiling.  
'Okay, who's next?' he asked himself. Not even caring that he just saw the calmest guy in the world get enraged by what he did. Emmett was on a role. He got to give two haircuts and learned to things: If vampires are VERY, VERY sad they actually manage to cry. If they're EXTREMELY, INHUMANLY mad, their eyes quickly go all black. _Now, lets find someone else to give a haircut too. This is to fun to stop now! _

(_Author's Note: No harsh reviews please. I hope you like chapter two. Emmett's getting sneaky. Should I stop now or make another chapter? Please review :) _)


	3. Notice

Notice:

* * *

Okay, **_Emmett Gives Jasper a Haircut _**has been put on _hold_. I would love nothing more then to actually write a third chapter, but I can't think of anyway to get around Edward's gift and it's driving me bananas! If anyone has any ideas they're willing to share, I'll be happy to look at them and really consider using them. I'll give credit! So, till then, _**Emmett Gives Jasper a Haircut **_shall be unfinished.


	4. Haircut Three

(_Author's Note: To Clear things up. Jasper has super short hair just long enough to spike. And, because of the update I did on Carlisle's chapter, he has a super short buzz cut_)

'_Emmett!_'  
'_Oh my God, my hair!_'  
'_What did you just do to my hair?_'  
'_No!_'  
'_Ugh! You're such an ass!_'  
'_Mom!_'

'Emmett has gone too far!' Alice Cullen hissed at the family meeting, which Emmett was absent of, 'I mean, just look what he did too me!' she gestured to her hair. Alice had been one of the many victims of Emmett's hair clippers. The back and sides of her head were buzzed to nearly skin while the top was left two inches or so longer and spiked. She hadn't had a vision informing her on what would happen if she let Emmett near her. Alice thought that since she was girl, Emmett would spare her…he didn't.  
'I don't look much better…' Bella Swan-Cullen said before standing up from her seat. Her once long brown hair was now cut-to her shoulders and she had straight bangs. How, Bella didn't know, but Emmett had somehow managed to dye her hair natural blonde without her knowing. 'The only people who haven't been attacked by Emmett are Esme, Rose and Edward. Emmett even got my father! Now he has a mullet and is mustache-less'  
'Wow…' Edward said as Bella sat back down next to him.  
'We need to get back at Emmett,' Alice said, 'We can't just let him get away with doing this to us!' everyone then turned and looked at Edward, who's eyes widened when they looked at him.  
'That's a good idea. Ed, cut his hair,' Bella said, looking at her husband.  
'What?' Edward said, completely caught off guard, 'Why me?'  
'You're the only one he'll let near his head!' Rosalie explained, 'And if he doesn't trust you, uh...Jasper will help, make him calm and more relaxed. Wont you Jazz?' Rosalie asked, eyeing her brother.  
'Of course, I'm only too happy too,' Jasper answered, smiling an enthusiastic smile. Everyone turned and looked at Edward, who unknowingly reached up and ran his hand through his mop of bronze hair. After a few minutes of unbarring silence, Edward let out a sigh of defeat.  
'Okay, I'm in,' he said. A small smile danced across his fight when everyone in the room cheered and Bella gave him a peck on the kiss.  
'Now…we wait…'

Emmett pulled his Jeep Wrangler into the driveway of the Cullen House and smiled when he saw his mother and father in the front yard, gardening. Carlisle had one arm around Esme's waist.  
'Hey guys,' he called out to his parents as he climbed out. Esme looked up, the sun rays causing her skin to glister like millions and millions of tiny diamonds, 'Decide to gardening today?'  
'Yes, wanna join us?' Esme asked before idly brushing a lock of caramel hair behind her ear.  
'Uh, thanks but no thanks. But have fun anyway,' Emmett said before turning and entering the Cullen house; not seeing the smile the couple shared with each other before returning their attention back to the garden. 'Guys I'm home!' he called out. 'Ness? Ed?' he looked in the living room, empty. He looked in the dining room, empty. He looked in the kitchen.  
'Hey Emmett,' Edward said casually before finishing off his deer blood drink.  
'Where is everybody?' Emmett asked before sitting down at the kitchen table.  
'All the girls went shopping, Esme and Carlisle are gardening, and Jasper went out to spend the entire day with Peter and Charlotte,' Edward answered as he placed the cup in the sink. 'Nice hair.'  
'What? Oh, hah…' Emmett ran a finger through his messed up curls. One of the flaws of driving a jeep, it always messed up his hair. Once he got out and he almost had a somewhat small afro. 'Gotta love driving a jeep, ha.'  
'If you got it cut shorter, it wouldn't be all crazy like that,' Edward said, causing Emmett's eyes to widen a little, 'I can cut it for you?' his eyes widened so much Edward thought they'd fall out of their sockets soon.  
'No thanks…' Emmett liked giving the hairs, didn't like receiving them. He started disliking getting haircuts when he was five years old when his mother butchered his dark curls, cut them so short everyone could see his pasty whit e scalp; which really stood out because of the tan he had from being outside so much.  
'You sure? I won't take a lot of, just enough so it doesn't look like you just came out of a fatal hurricane,' Edward said with a small smile.  
'Oh very funny Mr. Mop-Top,' Emmett rolled his eyes. Suddenly, slowly, calmness started to overcome the vampire. He closed his eyes and takes a deep breath. His muscles were relaxing, his nerves calming. '…Okay, you have to promise you won't take too much off!'  
'I promise. Across my non-beating heart,' Edward lied halfheartedly. Emmett took another long un-needed breath before getting up from his seat and pulling the chair away from the table; completely oblivious to the fact that Jasper was in the other room basically controlling him. Edward pulled a pair of scissors, the scissors Emmett's been using to be more exact, out of his pocket and walked over to his brother. He took his place behind him and gently started running his hand through Emmett's mess of black curls. He lifted one small curl and snipped the end off. He held it to Emmett's face. 'That's all I'm taking off,' he lied.  
'Okay…' Emmett said, calmness and relaxation filling his voice. Edward smiled before returning back to the back of Emmett. As quietly as he could, Edward pulled a pair of hair clippers, Emmett's hair clippers to be more exact, and plugged them in. Alice had switched the blades for him, so now the blades would take Emmett's hair down to NOTHING. No stubble, just smoothness. He turned them on, quietly thanking Emmett for buying quiet clippers, and placed them gingerly on the bottom of Emmett's neck. 'What the…' before he could finish, Edward pushed the clippers up the back of Emmett's head; causing tons and tons of black curls, some big some small, to fall to the ground. Emmett's eyes widened and he jumped up from the chair. Quickly, he ran his hand up the back of his head. There was a bald strip up the center of his head! Stop at the crown.  
'Edward!' Emmett roared, 'What did you just do!'  
'Exactly what you did to almost everyone else in this house. Now sit, you can't walk around with the back of your head looking like the back of a skunk,' Edward said with an amused smile. Emmett growled before taking a seat.

'He did it!' Alice whispered to everyone as they waited patiently in the living room. They had all snuck in when Emmett had entered the kitchen.  
Everyone smiled and quietly clapped their hands, all proud of themselves for talking Edward into doing this. Alice's eyes widened white and her face went emotionless. Images flashed before her eyes, 'He's gonna cry,' Alice said with a smile, her eyes still white. She blinked and her eyes were normal again. Well, normal for a vampire.  
'Awe, my poor monkey man…' Rosalie said, feeling a bit bad.  
'Don't you dare feel bad for him after what he did to us,' Alice said.  
'I can't help it. He's my man,' Rosalie said with a smile. Everyone smiled and laughed as quietly as possible.

Emmett frowned as he felt Edward buzz the hair around his ear to nothing.  
'You almost done?' he asked, wanting this to be over more then anything.  
'Almost,' Edward answered, enjoying every minute of this. He ran the clippers all over Emmett's hair three times. Once to buzz the hair, twice incase he missed some, and third time just to torture Emmett a little longer. Once he was done, he snapped the clippers off. 'All done,' he said with a smile. Emmett reached up and ran his hand over his head, frowning when he felt nothing but skin. His head snapped up and he stood up when he heard everyone shuffle into the room.  
'You so dissever that for doing what you did to us,' Alice said, her arms folded and a small smile on her face. Emmett didn't say anything, just continued to look at everyone. A hurt expression on his face.  
'Well Uncle Em, what do you think of your haircut?' Ness asked as she idly ran her hand through her now super-short, black hair. Her hair was styled the way Alice's was before her haircut. Emmett looked at all of them.  
'…I love it!' he said, a big ear-to-ear smile appearing on his face.  
'What?'  
'What!'  
'WHAT!' Alice cried out in disbelief.  
'Yeah, it's awesome!' Emmett said as he continued to run his hands over his head, 'Thanks! Now, off to find someone else to give a haircut too,' he said before walking out of the room, 'Maybe the wolf pack!' he walked out the front door, leaving his dumbfounded and utterly stunned family behind.

The End

(_Author's Note2: Sorry there wasn't an actual haircutting scene. But there you go, the final chapter! Now, time to give the credit! I got the idea for this chapter from both Vickykiki & Cullengirl10. I was originally gonna go merichuel idea, but something just felt...off when I tried to write it. If you guys don't like THIS chapter, I'll consider re-writing it with merichuel idea. Reviews are nice!)_


End file.
